"Hey, I’ve been having better sex and longer with this here http://xxx/xxx"

Sayers the Bakers’ Twitter entry on 26 February, 3am

"Apologies we have been hacked, we have just changed our password. Apologies for any messages you may have received!"

a rather more chaste Sayers the Bakers extinguishes the morning glory six hours later

"Thames Valley Police must always investigate reports of suspect packages and officers will always err on the side of caution"

police cordon off Abingdon town centre to defuse, erm, three bags of crushed chocolate biscuits