"She knows she has messed up bad"

- a "senior police source" quoted in The Sun (and sounding like they’ve seen too many US cop shows), commenting after one of Tony Blair’s close protection officers left a surprise in a toilet for Starbucks staff: a Glock 17 semi-automatic pistol

"I have to admit, I have a secret bakery fantasy"

- author and TV philosopher Alain de Botton has career doubts. Maybe he should ponder this poser before switching jobs: if a secret bakery remains secret and nobody visits it, does it still exist...?

"The Village Bakery Co-ed-pethy. The Village Bakery Co-id-poth...erm, The Village Bakery, near Wrexham!""

- BIA host Kate Thornton, presenting an award to The Village Bakery (Coedpoeth) (pr koyd-poyth), takes the shortcut to learning Welsh